I moved to Edinburgh after university. Before that,
I had efficiently drilled myself down into a hole: wallowing about
and wondering why I hadnt felt fulfilled by graduating, by
When I finished university, I didnt feel like I had
gained a degree; I felt like I had just suddenly lost university.
The thing that I had centred my life around had been taken away,
and I needed a new axis to spin around. Time to begin a new
I tried throwing myself into a relationship,
abandoning one sinking ship for another. Unfortunately,
relationships require an equilibrium, not some rudderless vagabond
looking for someone to orbit around. What I did have was a sticker
in my passport that would let me live in the UK for two years.
Move to Edinburgh, gravitate in that direction, build your life
around that for a while, I thought
Edinburgh is a city of hills, its bends and bows
covered up by cobblestones, its closes and alleys infested with
pubs. There was something energising about the deadline of this
life here you get two years here in Edinburgh. Youre free of
everything outside of this city: no career, no expectations, no
past regrets, no future stresses youre just in Edinburgh, and that
is good enough.
What is Christian up to?
Because my life didnt reach beyond the citys grips,
it made everything simpler. Earn some money to live, to travel,
make some friends, enjoy yourself, dont feel guilty for existing
without a motive. It was calming not living too far ahead of
I fell in love in Edinburgh. I didnt need to fall in
love; it wasnt on a checklist, it just approached me. I was able to
experience it rather than try and just impose it on someone.
Suddenly, that two years in Edinburgh didnt feel freeing as it had
before: it was a countdown to a different life.
Shes from Mexico. A ball of positivity, she could
talk troubled waters into smooth sailing.
Weve lived in four different countries in the two
years since leaving Scotland: all the experiences and opportunities
weve been granted during which have been incredible, and the
ability to share them with someone I truly love and fucking cherish
is magical. But these worldwide experiences come as a byproduct of
a larger goal to be able to start a life somewhere together. To be
able to find one place in which we can exist, not jumping from